Often a fortuitous event will have an inauspicious moment or two involved. It is easy to ignore the overall achievement and focus on the angst, the problems, the wrangling and the hindsight of shoulda, woulda, coulda. The dark moments can overshadow the accomplishment if the spotlight is focused on what went wrong instead of what went right. I often remind myself to concentrate on the lemonade not the lemons. Such is real estate and such is life.
As participants in the buying and selling of real estate it is important to resolve the issues, settle the disputes and not let the quibbles and personalities cloud the larger success of achieving a sizable accomplishment. Despair and delight come from within and are shaded by attitude, experiences and individual perception. It is a choice whether we recognize the success of the event by celebrating the hurdles we cleared and lessons learned, or lessen the achievement with continued self-sabotage by maintaining a narrow focus on the negative.
A few months ago I encountered an agent I had not seen for years. We chatted briefly and she said she remembered there were some big challenges in the transaction we worked together on, but in the end we closed the deal and everyone was happy. The buyer recently called to thank me for helping them make a savvy real estate purchase, and asked me to watch their neighborhood of choice for a fabulous view home. The dicey issues of raw sewage under the house and a faulty septic tank were resolved long ago.
It does not require a miracle to resolve real estate issues. Often a change in perspective and attitude will bring about understanding, compassion and resolution.
Norma Toering & Team RE/MAX Palos Verdes Realty
(310) 493-8333 / Office Phone: (310) 831-0800
PalosVerdesLifestyle - Nominated by Relocation.com as one of the top ten Los Angeles area real estate blogs. Ranked by Technorati in the top 1% of all blogs. As seen in the Daily Breeze newspaper.
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Norma Toering & Team RE/MAX Palos Verdes Realty
(310) 493-8333
PalosVerdesLifestyle- Norma's award winning site as the best Palos Verdes homes and real estate blog since 2007. Selected by Relocation.com as one of the top ten Los Angeles area real estate blogs. Chosen by MovingCost.com as one of the best Los Angeles realty blogs. Awarded 5 out of 5 stars by Lender411 blog review. Ranked by Technorati in the top 1% of all blogs. As seen in the Daily Breeze newspaper.
South Bay Los Angeles cities I sell real estate, property, houses and homes in: Palos Verdes Estates, Rolling Hills, Rolling Hills Estates, Rancho Palos Verdes, San Pedro, Long Beach, Torrance, Lomita, Redondo Beach, Hermosa Beach and Manhattan Beach. Based on information from the Association of REALTORS®/Multiple Listing as of the initial date of this article/blog publication and /or other sources. Display of MLS data is deemed reliable but is not guaranteed accurate by the MLS. The Broker/Agent providing the information contained herein may or may not have been the Listing and/or Selling Agent.
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Norma, it's so funny how our most challenging transactions look so different years later!
Patricia - Time has a way of smoothing out those rough edges.
Norma -
A change in attitude and perspective can change just about anything if only we choose to make it happen. Worth applying to all areas of life.
You are right there are so many problems with many deals. It is the end result that is what we strive for.
Perspective and attitude are in the eyes of the beholder and it's amazing how they can change over time.
It sounds like you have been making lemonade for a while, me too!
You are right the result is what we have to keep in mind and not the let the problems make us loose track of what is important.
Norma they always say keep the personalities out of it, at least between agents.
Detach from the outcome. We are facilitators bringing two parties together. Operative word; together.
right on target... very good post and really timely...sometimes we forget the big picture in the name of being right... thank you
Being fair to both parties always bring the best conclusion. .and a passion of service is the icing on the cake
Hi Norma, You are right on the button! This is a very insightful post and to steal a few of Fernando's words ....in this case....the icing was the also insightful comments!
Michael - An issue can be approached from several angles--some positive and some negative. The parties involved always have a choice.
Russ - A real estate transaction has many moving parts and a plethora of people involved--it's important to stay focused on the big picture and common goal.
Cameron - Time is a constant teacher.
Jen - Yes, I'm a big fan of making lemonade....
Byran - As the saying goes, keep your eye on the prize--and I'll add, not on the problem.
Gary - Good advice.
LIz - That's a pretty good definition of "agent" and the word together is key.
Debra - Winning a battle can be a short-lived victory.
Fernando - Striving to provide excellent service ensures we will treat all with fairness and respect--anything less is unacceptable.
Al and Peggy - One of the best thing about writing a post is reading the comments filled with wisdom, experiences and sage advice.
Norma:
So often, in the heat of the moment, folks forget about the overall goal, and who the transaction is really all about. But that's true in life in general, Most of the time the big problems, disappointments, or arguments fade away over time and the emotions associated with those issues do as well. And we realize it really was not all that bad.
Jeff
nice post keeping things in perspective is always a good thing sometimes a challenge though ;-)
These comments sound like Russian kitchen party - serious conversation, but a bottle of vodka!
Everything is in the perspective.
I couldn't agree more, I always sya that once egos get out of the way, things happen!
i know i will mangle the quote like Yogi Berra, but didn't Edison say genius is 1% inspiration and 99% perspiration? if you work at it, they will come, and they will remember the good things you did for them.
I also believe that we can make transactions go much easier by having a great attitude and also keeping the buyer and seller informed.
Norma - I like the idea of making lemonade out of lemons, and it is important to keep the personalities out of it.
Thanks Norma
It's so true that attitude makes such a difference. Some days the choice of having right thoughts requires more effort than others. The result is always the same...more peace, understanding and compassion.
How true this is! I remember thinking that the inspector standing knee deep in raw sewage during the inspection was not very comical....but today I can laugh about it...one new septic, one closed deal and one set of happy clients later...we are all good!
I keep my eyes focused on the solution not on the problem. Try it for a change of perspective.
Someone told me long ago (My first Realtor when I bought my first home) that being a Realtor was like being a marriage broker. You bring people together and try to negotiate a situation.
Hi Norma~ It all falls back on attitude! There is nothing in real estate that is life or death! There is usually a solution to just about every problem that can possibly arise.
Hi Norma, nice blog! Yes I feel our attitude is very important in the outcome of situations. I like your comment about lemonade and lemons. very nice!
I have such a poor long term memory that lucky for other real estate agents and past problem clients, I've often forgotten the grief they caused me! Wish I could say other folks would forget my past transgressions as well.
We make a choice of how to handle all situations and we also chose our moods. It can be difficult to remember and be aware when you are having a bad day because the universe will return what you put out to it!
I think as Realtors one of the most important things we can do is listen. If you listen and ask enough questions you can get to the heart of the problem. And once you find out what the problem is, you are more than halfway to solving it.
Norma ~ This was a nice read! There are many agents that have not so great reputations. They are the ones that you dread doing a deal with so you always proceed with caution. Funny thing though, those are the agents that I usually end up really enjoying and actually learning from them. It is all perception and attitude!!
Norma...
The concept.....As refreshing as that pitcher of Lemonaid! Thank you for serving it up.
Very nice post. It's interesting to see who remembers what, long after a deal closes. We often have very different perspectives, depending on your attitude.
I think you had an overall achievement by using two big words in the first sentence of your blog: fortuitous and inauspicious!
WOW -- I'm impressed!! I just read that "cursive" is a thing of the past, and I would bet -- with this present texting generation -- our little darligs won't know anything other then one syllable words come 2040.
Sorry, nothing to do with your blog, which is a good one. And our local market is very small. Prima Donna agents, high-maintenance . . . yup, we don't have to point them out. Their reputation preceeds them, unfortunately.
Norma, we have to keep our eyes on the goal which is to bring the two parties together, personalities and rough patches aside.
Norma -- I worked with an agent several years ago whose buyer cancelled our contract when she saw a rat in the backyard during the Inspection. We have laughed about this event many times since although it was frustrating at the time. Who said "Time Heals All Wounds"?
I agree with a statement above, "keep personalities out of it." If everyone is working towards the same goal, it can usually get done. You know there are going to be challenges; you just have to work through them.
Very true Norma. I have worked with a handfull of agents who think WIN-WIN. I will gladly do business with them. I love positive people.
Norma I have to agree! If you keep a level head, & stay on top of your deals, then you will do fine. Even if you can't make them work in the end, if you do everything you can for the buyer or seller, they are not going to blame you! They are going to know that you were there for them through it all, and thats what matters to them most!
Nothing is either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.
My chiropractor asked me once why I was so tense. I told him I was stressed. And he said, "Being stressed is a choice. Things happen, but how we react to life events is our choice." I've never forgotten those words, though sometimes they get pushed way down in my subconscious, on top of which I inadvertently place, from time to time, negative emotion and perception. Your blog was a great reminder to focus on the end goal. Thanks Norma.
Tanya in Montreal
I only remember the agents that should totally be avoided at all costs. Can't remember the septic system problems, the cracks in the ceilings, etc. I guess I just remember the end result for the sellers or buyers. Hopefully that's a good thing.